Standards

Principles and values define standards.
I love our human race that feels that we all know the right way it is going to work for all people from a very young age. Sure, logic tells us our children learn by example and if we do everything right and true they also will become right and true too, correct?
Sadly though, by some undefined interventions of others in their life and the fact that they do have brains and are not confined to only your own home and therefore are of free choice and ability. The best laid plans and all just sometimes doesn’t work out!

Sure we should all presume to teach our children daily what is a loving understanding family and hopefully when they grow into those men and women that we hope for that they too will be loving and caring and tried and true etc, etc, etc…
Oops! It doesn’t always work out that way though...

This always amazes me, oddly enough if you have two children in the same family who have the same parents they will become so different as adults and that’s the same with five or more siblings too, all different with very dissimilar personalities.
When I hear parents saying that because they do this or that it will assure that the child will be this or that way…sorry folks; it doesn’t work that way!
Thinking for themselves and decision making oddly enough becomes a part of their lives early on. Sure if you want them to be isolated from others and not able to think or decide for themselves then and only then will you possibly produce a parrot or even an Eddie Haskell. Anyone who grew up in the nineteen-fifties knows who that is; for those who don’t, in the Leave It To Beaver TV Show he was a friend of the Beaves older brother, Walley. Eddie was nice to all the adults being oh so sweet, saccharin sweet actually, to all parents and evil to the Beave and other kids he wanted to get even with; he was a conniver and trouble maker while all the time smiling at the grownups like a little angel! Very two faced. A trivia fact is though the actor who portrayed the character of Eddie did grow up to become a Los Angeles police officer and I understand quite an angel in the city of angels.

Crazy as it may seem sometimes the worse parents seem to produce some of the best kids who turn into responsible capable productive loving adults. Believe it or not I have seen it happen and I do believe it is because they look at those people and learned from them what NOT to do. Now this is just an observation. But I have seen neglected children go completely the other way with their own children. And too loving parents produce selfish bratty horrid people. It’s a shame they don’t come with a handbook, because raising them is definitely a crap shoot.
My own two sons are very independent well educated capable responsible loving adults and yet one is more family oriented and caring than the other, same parents treated the same way.
Although, it would be unjust to say that when they grew to a certain point of a changed behavior we as only humans can honestly say react to that behavior accordingly. And some children are more strong willed than others with their own ideas and concepts.
But in truth right from wrong is taught by all parents to their children by the age of three.
And the other thing is true to almost everyone that anything anyone needs to know in life you learn in Kindergarten.
Mostly interpersonal relationships and when to talk and when not to, and of course when to nap, LOL!
Thanks for allowing me to discuss what I have been observing all these years and even though I did take about two years of abnormal child psychology it doesn’t work in the real world and so my recommendation from raising two smart men would be to use your instincts since they are usually more than right when it comes to your own little loves…
For that is what we must let them all know each and everyday that no matter what, WE DO LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY!
That’s all…

On that tried and true method of child rearing I would like to be the first to say to you to have a very happy good night and to ask you kindly to count those blessings and to share those overages and we will too!

And next time please be here or be square, ya hear?

PS Congrats to the newlyweds, Kate and Will, some kids turn out just great, huh?