Tuesday, October 29, 2013

To be or not to be...



To do or not to do?

 “To Be Or Not To Be”: Spoken by Hamlet, Act 3 Scene 1
To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, ’tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there’s the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover’d country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.–Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remember’d.”



Odd how some days seem more difficult than others, hmm?
I am speaking about making decisions, life changing perhaps, but not to the point of life and death, but somehow not the same as it had been, do you get my drift?
Sure you do, since all of you are brilliant!
I know in true drama queen fashion I got your attention with a quote that very few of us have not heard before, Hamlet’s Soliloquy
…GOTCHA! And no, I will not be dying in the near future, since I don’t give up, easily…!

Sure I won’t be slinging any arrows either, but the tragedy that occurred just a year ago today was one of, “The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks…”
Super Storm Sandy devastated a large swath of an area of our fine country on this day a year ago today and still many have not renewed their states of their lives. Our prayers have not stopped reaching towards the people who need them there and  let it be known that we are still wishing all to be well eventually and we know in time that shall be the case!…

But to be honest the quote was more for me  to determine my decision making as of this time in my life, again NOT earth shattering, but of guilt and a trifle of failure…I have made the decision, to wait on my return to the gym/rehab, to at least until next Monday, due to my body still needing special care. My dry cough that I hadn’t mentioned, but the doctor noticed has some affect on my chest inflammation as well as the burning sensation there in the shoulders as well and my lower back, and my eyes that are still not right and I have been having many visual disturbances. Duplicity, is the issue with my insight and sight… seeing double and well as fuzziness/blurry, and those darn floaters, and oh I shan’t go on… it is way too much to put any of you through, that is listening to my constant litany…

In some ways though, all of us are fighting wars daily, true?
And so the quote is an advantageous look into its use to describe the way many lives are challenged!
Those are the final decisive factors that make us who we are.
So each of us can read into the truest meaning of those special words and go on from there…
That’s all; and that is what we may consider enormous choices to make …
So specific to each of us.
Although, mine are no cause to ask for outsider help; my reasoning is quite simple, a wait and see attitude and if it hurts when you do this, don’t do that…!
Tomorrow will be the day of judgment on whether or not to go forth with additional medical intervention in the form of speaking with a doctor, since it will be two and half days of no steroid medication in me.
I would think that I would be feeling better by now?
It is funny this is the fifth time I have been through an exacerbation and one would think that you would remember that, hmm?
Sadly, I do not…!
That is how long this hard stuff, well not too hard this time, rather weak in comparison to other dosing that I have been through…and that is perhaps why this is a bit mystifying to me if it will work at all… and yes, it is more than definitely my fault if it doesn’t due to me not going for the higher dosage I suspect… oh well… the doc wanted to give it to me, but I said no.
GUILT,GUILT,GUILT!
STUPIDITY, STUPIDITY, STUPIDITY!
So very typical, when I try to stop the ingestion of meds, now I am also taking more Baclofen, my anti-spasmodic, due to needing the intervention… oh well…
Again, on that note of my VERY BIG GOOF allow me to be the very first to wish all of you a very happy good night and ask you to kindly count all your blessings and share all your overages with you know who and we will too!

And next time please be here or be square, ya hear!

Speaking My Mind: Which way will the war go?

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