Sunday, February 10, 2013

Speaking kindly...


As children we are taught to be kind and polite if we have parents who believe in manners. Some though, have parents that feel reminding their children to constantly say please and thank you is a form of badgering their child to behave when they may have their reasons not to. Whatever parenting ways you may feel are yours; as an adult bringing up a child from infancy to adulthood is no easy job, never was and never will be. Sure we like to think that all will be simple and not take our hearts out and twist them with each milestone of their graduation from sleeping babes to walking around getting into everything…to school children with perfect behavior that you have no idea where it came from since you were of the thinking that allowing your child to be free and therefore a wild child was just being modern and loving them for their natural selves. But how that happened that teachers telling you what a joy that your boy or girl is to be in their classroom, does give certain credence to the thought that letting the wild run free in way will tame. Lenient is more than spoiling a child it is speaking to and with them every step of the way and at different ages asking for their input, but that is just good parenting and teaching young people how to think for themselves. Manners you do know are not the same as teaching right from wrong and I do believe that all parents agree on that as a constant in any child rearing. Being a decent human being is usually taught more by example than saying to do this or that though and when ours were growing up I would love to think that we both set a fine example for them to follow, with a working ethic of working hard, and being altruistic in helping others as volunteers. We always saved for things we wanted and paid our sons when they helped us in our businesses which gave them the ability to buy what they wanted vehicle wise by age fifteen/sixteen, here in Florida where the driving age is sixteen. There is no doubt in my mind that we raised two fine men, although we may have made many mistakes over the years, but who hasn’t? I know my parents did and my husband’s parents did too… Being perfect is way too hard for any kid to live up to, but few get it until they have children of their own… So on this eve of our younger son’s birthday, our estranged one, I wish him love with his new bride and happiness and many children to teach him what a parent does right and wrong, and to always remember as a parent, no matter what, we love our children always and forever…parents are not unlike dogs in that respect with love our offspring unconditionally! Happy 37th Birthday son, you were born at 5:05 A.M. on a Wednesday after only four hours and twenty minutes labor, the doctor went home since your brother had taken twenty-nine and half hours he thought we had more time, but we didn’t and I was very happy for that… you were seven pounds eight and half ounces and twenty-two inches long and did not cry right away, since your mom wanted you delivered by the LaBoyer Method with the lights all low to not to frighten you when you entered the world… but you not crying scared me since I thought something was wrong forgetting my reasoning for the calming low lights… and so the nurse tapped your tushy and you let out a healthy howl. And that was my memories of your entrĂ©e into this world…and from then on you were in a hurry and did everything at a nano speed, sitting at three months, standing at five months, walking holding on at six months, not holding by ten months, talking in sentences at a year, “I see you!”, must have been from all those times playing peek-a-boo, by two and a half you surprised everyone with being able to read all those books you had us read over and over again to you, you fooled them with your right-on memorization of them. At six you were put into the gifted program due to ace the IOWA test being in the 99% with math on a twelfth grade level and reading comprehension too. On and on… playing your older brother’s music when you were just four from his piano lessons, but eventually take music theory at fifteen and acing that too, but already being able to play most all keyboards as well as a guitar. Sound Seduction, was the name of your rock band while in high school. Yes, you did sports too, your soccer coach called you his whole team, you surfed by teaching yourself and water skied too, horse back riding and SCUBA and let’s not forget tennis, golf and handball and beach volley ball! That you tried everything and whatever you tried you did well. Now you are an adult who has a successful career and for that your future is secure. Not to mention a loving wife… And so although you may never know any of this that we did remember it all, it will be here long after your father and I are gone… for you to access if you care to know that we knew you when you loved us too… And all we want you to know is that we LOVE YOU NOW AS ALWAYS! Happy Birthday tomorrow dear son.

Speaking My Mind: Which way will the war go?

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